my jaw never dropped so hard...

this shocks me.

http://www.crystalcathedral.org/inchurch/

I encourage you to check it out. Unbelievable. this building, this so called church has 10,000 members, a 17 foot 18 karat gold cross, an outdoor movie screen for "drive-in" worshipers. And so this does not make sense to me. i thought Jesus was teaching and acting against this in mark 12. Jesus flips those tables that make the poor even poorer then they are. Seriously i find this ridiculous. Also when you go to this link above. Scroll down on the right side and look how happy the girl is in the button where it says accept Christ. then after clicking on that you will come to a screen where is says Yes, i want to accept Christ, say this prayer and boom you life is now perfect just like the girl in the picture. Please continue to live your life the same way, buying your expensive clothes made in sweatshops, driving SUVs, but please do come back to our church where you can give money to us so we can put up more 18 karat gold crosses in our megachurch. it gets me everytime. but sorry, i find this way of living unbelievable and please don't get me wrong i am far from perfect and i most certainly do not have well anything figured out. But from what i have read about Jesus and what he has actually said. This is not what Jesus wants in this world while there are children being beaten because they are exhausted working 10 hours or more in the poorest conditions, or going to bed each night with no food in their stomach. Now sure, God might be working in some powerful powerful ways at Crystal Cathedral but i just can't get past the size and money that would have been put into building and maintaining this church.
And there is a little cynical humor here, 3 people have committed suicide here? WHAT? yes suicide. I can't get my head around this one either. We're so desperately searching for new fresh life and we're hoping to find it in a safe church environment. now i don't know the reason for them doing this act, nor do i want to judge. I just hope this church learns from these acts, build your church on love, community and peace.

I write this with hesitation. my words are full of judgment, condemnation, and with the words of i have all the answers. I most definitely do not have it all together, i want to put this out there with an aching in my heart, and a plea that wow, I need to look at myself first. Do i actually know Jesus and what he is doing in this world. This church is just a reminder that i need follow galatians 5:25's lead that says "since we live by the Spirit, let us keep in step with the Spirit" i need to sit down, slow down, have a coffee with Jesus at truly figure out where hes going and then get up and go. As i look around my room and as i search for that verse above, i have 5 Bibles just in my room. each in a different version. another WHAT? can be added here. And for some your jaw can be dropped at that. So am i the same as this church congregation? maybe so. I just hope that continually each day both of us and whoever reading takes one step forward, asking the Spirit to guide us into freedom, free us from condemnation, and show us what it truly means to follow Jesus.

my name is jenni and i don't have things figured out, nor do i really want to have everything figured out. what would be the fun,and excitement of following a God who you had all figured out.

Peace.